The moment when you started to afraid of something you thought it won't happen anymore .

Well ,this time i'm totally afraid that it will happen .
I hurts my thighs include today 4th times ..
The feeling of hurting it today much more worst than before .
The feeling came back after all many years that i thought won't happen anymore .
Seriously to be frankly right now ,i'm afraid that my leg will dislocated once again and this time might become an OKU ? Since my doctor that treated me since when i small had died ,so i don't think this new doctor will help me by looking my old information regarding it .

I feared .
I afraid .
I scare .
I worry .

So i gonna take leave on tomorrow ,probably on wednesday just to hope that the pain will go away and pray that nothing will happen ,hopefully it recover ~
And i don't wish to see doctor ,afraid of the result .

I feel touched and happy of someone told me that if i became an OKU ,he will take care me even his parents doesn't agree . Or anything that he told me  :)
Hope is true and really can last long forever our relationship,i meant it :) 

But i don't wish that i get bad result , god bless me .